Exercise 1: Change is Possible

by Michael O'Brien, Ed.D

The truth is, you really can change yourself. It is just very hard. And you can’t do it with New Year’s resolutions, with wishing and hoping alone. And you certainly can’t do it by simply understanding the theory of leadership or personal change, which isn’t all that hard to grasp. As a physician you were trained to think one way, and now, as a physician leader, you're being asked to think another; therefore, change is even more important and more difficult. 

 

But, if you take a few minutes every day, both previewing the ideas and taking the actions I recommend, you will notice your relationships with others improving, conversations and meetings will be more satisfying, your priorities and values will be more a part of your life. You will achieve more.

Woven into my methodology are four overlapping practices:

1. Raising consciousness
2. Imagining
3. Framing and reframing
4. Integrating new perspectives

Raising your consciousness means not just thinking, but thinking about thinking, noticing—and managing—the workings of your mind so your mind won’t run away with your life like a startled horse. I will discuss simple and immediate ways of raising your consciousness later in more detail. Practice them; chances are you’ll notice an immediate improvement in your quality of life.  

When you imagine, you create a mental picture—the most vivid image you can—of an outcome you desire. If you’re typical, however, most of the imagining you do goes by another name: worry. This most common form of imagining leads not to something you want but to something you don’t, and it works depressingly well.

 

Framing and reframing are about interpreting the world, making meaning, assigning significance to the events of life. It is not the events of life that matter but our opinion of them. You don’t have to think of anything in any particular way. You can think of green as white if you wish. But some ways of thinking about things are more helpful than others. Learning to frame and reframe means learning to see things in the most helpful light, that’s all.

 

Where Does It Hurt?

This first exercise offers a practical, intimate beginning for the process of personal change. At the heart of controlled, intentional personal change and leadership lies personal mastery. Think of mastery as an expan­sion of your ability to produce precisely the results you want in your work and in your life. Mastery requires the discipline of noticing what’s working and what isn’t, what you’re ignoring, and where you can grow.
Take ten minutes with a journal or notebook and answer the following questions. (Please don’t be too analytical. Trust your gut. Write down the first ­responses that come to you.)

1.   Where are you suffering in your life right now? (Or, where are you stuck, where are you not producing the results you would like?)

2.   What are the rubs, distresses, upsets, or crises in your life? (Put another way, what mistakes are you in the middle of right now? Is there something unpleasant you are ­ignoring?)

3.   Are there any relationships that are troubling you, or are not as productive or satisfying as they should be?

When your list is complete, make a note in this journal or notebook entry titled “Focus.” Under this heading select two problems from your list that you’d like to handle soon.

Now make another entry titled “Review.” When you are finished with the twenty-one exercises to come, I will ask you to return to this entry and file a brief report to yourself on the current status of these problems. As your life changes, this is a good exercise to repeat often.